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So many people today struggle with negative self-talk. For many, it comes naturally and it can be hard to detect. Oftentimes, negativity has become such a habit that people can’t always catch themselves when they’re dealing with negative self-talk–and that is a horrible thing.
Negative Self-Talk: Comparison
Examples of negative self-talk come in many forms. In fact, some of the hardest forms of negative self-talk have to do with comparison. Everyone knows that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, yet we often find ourselves doing it anyway, and it can truly diminish your own happiness and success. As the saying goes, “Don’t compare your chapter one to someone else’s chapter ten.” In other words, realize everyone is on a different path in life and in a different place in life, and always prioritize being better than you were yesterday, rather than trying to be as good as or “better than” anyone else.
Negative Self-Talk: Finding Flaws
In any case, when thinking about negative self-talk, you must also recognize the other forms of negative self-talk. Being able to do so is the first step to tuning that negative self-talk into positive, kind words that will actually help you perform better in your day-to-day life. Some common examples would be looking in the mirror and focusing on what you consider to be your flaws. Or looking at an outfit and thinking about how bad you feel you’d look in it. These are negative thoughts that you need to work to identify and control.
Instead of looking in the mirror and saying how much you hate this or that, look in the mirror and make a conscious decision to see what you like about yourself. Maybe it’s your gorgeous eye color, your cute freckles, your strong arms, or something else entirely. The point is, stop focusing on what you don’t like and find things that you do like to focus on. This will automatically begin to transform how you see yourself and how you think about yourself.
Stop It! Turn It into Something Positive
Likewise, whenever you catch any other negative thoughts floating through your mind, make a conscious effort to control them and turn them into something positive.
Are you kicking yourself for being shy or perhaps for saying something you thought was embarrassing? Instead of getting on yourself for it, praise yourself for other things you have done that day. For instance, maybe your words didn’t come out right when you tried to greet a fellow co-worker, but you made the effort–and that speaks volumes.
With time, changing your negative self-talk into positive self-talk will do wonders for your self-esteem and confidence, and as those things increase, you’ll naturally find your positivity to improve. It’s a cycle of increasing happiness that you’re sure to love, you just have to work to get it going.
Loving Life–The Reboot!