Spring Week: Day 2–Stop Comparing Yourself

woman looking out of window

It’s Finally Spring Week

Day 2: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others and Accept Your Imperfections

Hello Everyone! It’s Day #2 of “It’s Finally Spring” Week.

I hope you enjoyed the first installment yesterday and learned some tips that can help you manage the decluttering of your house.

Today, I’m excited because there’s a nice gift at the end of this article. See, spring has really sprung here, right?

Tuesday’s Topic: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others and Accept Your Imperfections

Spring! It’s nice outside, people are exercising, having outdoor parties, going on fabulous trips…

Do you measure your life with that of others? Comparing yourself to all that you see from other people. Feeling jealous of what they have and why don’t you have that too. You aren’t alone in that. But it can drag you down.

Read on for more…

FIve Reasons You Shouldn’t Compare Yourself to Others

Social comparison is an attempt to make accurate assessments of ourselves. It has become common now more than ever before with the explosion of social media. These platforms provide a never-ending stream of content which we can use to compare ourselves. What’s more, social media has taken our attempts to keep up with the Joneses beyond the neighborhood and onto a global stage.

Although comparing your looks, possessions, or lifestyle to that of others can be a source or motivation, it has its downsides as well. It becomes a problem when you start to gauge your own self-worth based on the accomplishments, qualities, or possessions of others.

This is an emotionally dangerous trap and can have a negative impact on you and your family. Here are 5 reasons why you shouldn’t compare yourself to others.

Comparisons Will Steal Your Joydon't let them steal your joy

It’s natural to long for things or accomplishments that other people have. However, this yearning for the kind of life or opportunities that someone else has can often provoke feelings of envy. At that point, your own happiness will be at risk because you’ll feel mediocre compared to others. This can happen to so-called high-achieving people as well. Everyone can fall prey to it.

If you evaluate your self-worth by constantly comparing yourself with others, there will be a vicious cycle of discontentment that’ll leave you more dejected than ever.

Failure Becomes More Likely

People who compare themselves with others find that they’re always lacking in something. Because let’s face it, there will always be someone who’s more successful, more talented, better looking, or generally doing better than you in life. If you judge yourself based on what you don’t have, your self-esteem will start to drop. And once you feel you can never measure up, this can lead to a downward spiral of giving up on your goals.

Comparisons Disregard Differences in Each Person’s Circumstances

All too often than not, most people don’t consider any personal differences between themselves and celebrities or peers that they compare themselves to. As a result, successful people come off as overnight sensations which is never the case. The truth is that everyone goes through struggles and setbacks on the path to success. And you typically have no idea what that person has gone dealt with or how long it took. Therefore, you can’t truly judge your own worth by comparing yourself to someone leading a completely different life and in totally different circumstance than yours.

Comparisons Centered on Superiority Hinder Personal Growth

Sometimes people compare themselves to others who are “beneath” them in a bid to boost their own self-esteem. However, if you enjoy feeling superior to others, your own sense of self-worth gets inflated and you won’t work on the areas in your life that need improvement. Instead of trying to pass yourself off as better than everyone else, make comparisons with people who are better than you in one respect or another and use their success as an example you can try to emulate. That’s an instance when comparing yourself to others can be beneficial.

Greatest HitsUsing Inaccurate Information for Self-Comparison

While you may think that some people are leading an amazing life, this isn’t always the case. There’s no such thing as a perfect life. Everyone experiences challenges in life, but people like to present to the outside world an edited version of their reality. And while they hide behind this facade of perfectionism, their lives aren’t always as blissful as they have other people think. Trying to compare yourself with a celebrity or peer you perceive to have a perfect life is setting standards that those people themselves probably don’t even live up to. So, the next time you find yourself comparing your life to that of a neighbor, friend, or superstar, remember that you don’t necessarily know every detail about their lives.

So, if you aren’t perfect, what actually are you supposed to do with that? You have to learn to accept the things that aren’t perfect. The next section looks at how to do that.

How to Be Happy with Your Imperfections

Is a full moon no longer stunning on a starless night just because it has countless spots and craters?

To be happy with your imperfections, you need to see things from a different perspective. While perfection is always the goal, it takes time and patience to become a master at any skill. And on the flip side, once perfection has been attained, can we be sure we would then be happy? Once you’ve reached the zenith of knowledge and perfection, there’s nothing else to explore, no truth left to find, no passion left to recreate. Here are some basic points that could help you find that differing perspective.:

Good and Bad Are Opposite Sides of a Coin

Judging someone to be good or bad clearly depends upon one’s perspective. What’s good to one individual might be bad to another and vice-versa. Change your perspective if it’s going to make you happier.

Being Loyal and Grateful Provides a Sense of UnderstandingDaily gratitude

Creating a journal about how grateful you are for what you have and listing those things as your priorities will ensure a better future for yourself. It can remind you of what you have to be thankful for and place an emphasis on the positives in your life. Remember it’s only you who can influence yourself.

Deflate Your Ego

A blinding ego is a problem which can be curbed easily if you can stop thinking about what others think of you. Start thinking about yourself, concentrate on your actions, and strive to become the best version of who you want to be.

Talk It Out

Sometimes a discussion with someone who has gone through a lot in life can be beneficial. Once you realize your problems are minuscule as compared to the sufferings of the world, you will feel gratitude and be thankful for all that you have (and not what you lack).

Keep Yourself Healthy

A healthy body is one of the best ways to maintain self-motivation and a vigorous soul. Good eating and sleeping habits are needed to take care of the body. Yoga is also a form of exercise that can lead to better health and a more serene soul.

Past mistakesLet Go of Past Mistakes

Sometimes we beat ourselves up too much over mistakes made in the past. Try to forgive and forget all the unhappiness and instead, thank and love the lessons those mistakes brought.

At the end of the day, imperfection isn’t the problem: the need for perfection is. Perfection can lead to pride. So, to counter that, spend time with positive, happy people. Don’t take insults personally because these insults can help you in your personal development — consider them places to improve. Most importantly, know that the only person you can control is yourself, and by accepting who you are at the core, you’ll learn to be happy with what you have—imperfections and all.

 

These concepts are a work in progress for most people. Today’s freebie can help you work on bettering yourself – it’s a report and a 365-day planner called “A Better Me”. The report has 101 tips to better yourself and the planner has almost 400 pages that you can use to journal through the tips and your thoughts and goals.

Click here to get your first freebie for “It’s Finally Spring” week.

More of Spring week tomorrow,

Loving Life—The Reboot!

Dominique

 

 

Comments

  1. Alex

    Such a great read, I cannot agree more (or be more guilty of comparing myself to others!). As a mother I think it’s so easy to get caught up in the comparison game, but you’ve presented some great insight and tips here!

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      Dominique

      Thank you! It is so easy to get sucked into the entire perfect mother cycle, isn’t it? We moms have to stick together — thanks for reading!

  2. Lily

    I’ve been struggling with this my whole life, and only recently have begun understanding what comparison has been doing to my confidence and self-esteem. It’s still a lot of work, but the realization went a long way towards increasing my happiness. Thank you for writing this!

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      Dominique

      Thank you — I started having more issues with comparing myself when I had kids. Go figure! We are all good enough! Thanks for reading and have a wonderful weekend!

  3. Sara | mshealthesteem.com

    Comparison truly is the thief of joy. It can be really hard to stop comparing yourself to others, but it’ so liberating! And truly wonderful for your well-being ^^. Thank you for sharing such an important message!

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      Dominique

      It’s hard, isn’t it? Especially when you are online all of the time and you see everyone else — it takes work and mental toughness to not compare right? Thanks for reading!

  4. Thebloomsite

    It is very important to accept your uniqueness but tough to do most of the time. These are some great reminders and tips.

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